I'm sure that Sarah Jessica Parker is a sweet, lovely person. She's probably very nice to common little people like you and me, and you can't deny that she's got great hair and a slammin' body. I know a lot of people gush over her fashion sense as well, but since I care precisely not at all about fashion, I'm going to go ahead and remain neutral on that point. But sweet spirit and hot body aside, I'm sorry to say that Sarah Jessica Parker is a butter face. BUT-TER FACE.My first instinct when looking upon the SJP is to whinny. She's got a biggole horse face with teeth to match: big, bucky, and curved convexly. I can't help but think she must be a prize-winning apple eater. Her nose is unbelievably long, which I guess makes sense if it's going to be in proportion to her face. But when you pair it with the mole on her pointy chin, I want to slap all these people who laud her great beauty and remind them that long, hooked noses and chin moles are characteristics traditionally associated with witches. Had the SJP been alive during the middle ages, I think she'd have had a terrible time outwitting wily, overzealous villagers trying to fool her into climbing up on wood piles or inviting her to dinner as an easy way to get her to voluntarily sit in a dunking chair. God bless her, she wouldn't last the week.
Now, I know all this sounds cold-hearted and judgmental, and it is. Heaven knows I'm no great beauty and I'm not going to be winning any modeling contracts in this lifetime. But I believe in calling a spade a spade. Let's appreciate the SJP for what she is and not try to delude ourselves or others into thinking she's a great beauty because she's not; she's thin with a perky bosom and awesome hair.
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7 comments:
LOL every time she's on TV Dakin calls her horseface. She really is, isn't she? And she's married to a milquetoast.
I think she did finally get her mole removed.
Don't worry, I'm don't judge. But yeah...poor SJP, she's not working with the best mug, this is true. I'm all for aging gracefully, but I think it's time for her to give Botox a go. I would kill for her hair though!
http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/
I'd take thin with perky boobs. Sadly I'm confident that no one would describe me as such.
Of course no one could accuse me of having a horse face either.
but dude, I have ugly hands.
Do you see how I made this about me?
I am somewhat ashamed.
Yah, I saw this list once, something like Unsexiest good looking celebrities, er something, and she was on it. I've never liked her much, her fashion is odd and her acting is crap, not to mention the butter face.
Oh and your comment about the hook nose and warty chin looking like a witch, there's some show where they take a celeb and research their ancestry and her big discovery was that she was related to a woman who was tried during the Salem witch trials but acquitted.
I love SJP - don't be so mean! She can look really cute on Sex and the City - and I think she's perfect at Carrie.
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