Call me a prude, but I believe a woman's personal grooming is something best kept between her, her partner, and her gynecologist. It is not something to be flashed at innocent, unsuspecting souls in the Comcast parking lot when all they want to do is pick up their new cable box and get back home to set the DVR. But try telling that to the nasty woman in the red dress and faux fur coat that parked next to me yesterday.
I have seriously never seen anything like this before and I never want to see anything like it again. I came walking out of the Comcast building and saw this woman standing next to her Toyota minivan changing her shoes. As I got closer, I realized that bending over had caused her dress to ride a good THREE INCHES up her backside, showing crack from both the back AND front nether regions. The great tragedy of it all was that to ease her task she actually hoisted her leg up into the van. I think you're getting a visual now. If this woman and her lady bits haven't already been featured on People of WalMart, they will be soon. All I could think was, "This woman must be a prostitute." But I still can't figure out why a prostitute would be driving a new minivan.
The only good that might come from this whole experience is the possible coining of a new term, flooned: when you're simultaneously mooned and flashed. What do you think?
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5 comments:
Yeah, when I wear short dresses like that, I never bend over. Please.
Um. Gross. Times a billion. Plus 40,ooo. Divided by 1. Which still equals Ewww.
And my word verification is "denuted." HAHAHAHAHA!
Boob Nazi, her dress was barely covering her butt cheeks without bending over. I seriously doubt you would really wear such a garment.
April, we totally need to come up with a definition or use for term "denuted." HAHAHAHAHA, indeed!
Oh my gosh! I can't get that image out of my head. It's seared on my psyche. It's burned in my brain. I'll never be the same again. Glad I didn't witness that in person. I already need therapy...
I'm starting to think that reading this while eating breakfast was a mistake.
She seriously hoisted her leg? Barf.
Also she must be a good prostitute to be able to afford a new mini-van. I'm sure it comes in handy while she's at work.
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